Intellligent Optimism Wins in Today's World
by Eileen McDargh
Published on this site: August 31st, 2005 - See
more articles from this month
The reality of today's world seems to leave little room
for optimism. Almost every news story can lead because it
does bleed. We hear of critical food shortages in Africa,
daily gang deaths on city streets, the profiteering from child
pornography, and the climatic disasters prompted by global
warming. Health care costs move up faster than a hummingbird
in flight and more children now spout profanities as a regular
part of speech. With such negativity, no wonder a 2004 U.S.
government survey found that depression afflicts one in 10
adults 14 days a onth
or more.
You probably get depressed just reading the opening paragraph.
But wait! There is hope. Not the cock-eyed optimism that became
fodder for a song from the musical South Pacific, but rather
what psychologists in France are calling "intelligent
optimism." Such optimism does not deny the reality of
today's world, but rather seeks to LEARN how to fashion a
life amid such difficulties. Martin Seligman, the psychologist
who had made optimism and happiness his life's work, would
agree with the French: optimism can be taught.
Consider these basic steps:
- Focus on what you can control. Don't get carried
away by circumstances you cannot change. You might not change
global warming but you can control your energy consumption.
You can't stop the downsizing in your company but you can
arm yourself with marketable skills.
- Reframe the event so that you are not a victim.
There is always another way to view a situation. The flight
cancellation that caused me to miss (and forfeit) a major
engagement was not "planned" to "get"
me. It just was. My choice is to figure out what I can do
to help the current client and what I will put in the place
of the cancelled work.
- Think "enough". When we concentrate
on what we don't have, we miss all the many things we do
have. The truth of the matter is that if you are reading
this article, you do have enough computer power. You do
have enough intelligence. You do have enough time.
- Cultivate optimistic responses. Like a farmer
tending a field, optimism will never grow unless it is watered,
fed, weeded and nourished. We all have days in which negativity
can take over. And, sometimes, that is a WISE response because
it keeps us grounded in reality. Just make sure it is reality
and not the imagination making extraordinary leaps into
conjecture. Weed out that conjecture. Ask what you can DO
to see a result that gives you a sense of power. If we don't
cultivate such intelligent optimism, be aware of reality
and willing to find options, then we might do what Alexander
Graham Bell warned. "Stare so long at the closed door
we fail to see the one that is opening."
- Remember the power of generations. Children of
depressed parents are more prone to depression. Children
of optimists are more prone to be optimists. What do you
choose to pass along? Even if your parents were negative,
you can break the cycle with stopping, freeze-framing a
situation, listening to the negative self talk, and then
literally giving yourself a different message. Yes, this
takes practice but you can make it a habit if you work it
over time.
Ultimately, intelligent optimists understand that change
and chaos are given. They know that "this too shall pass".
In the meantime, they CHOOSE to take whatever action they
can within their own sphere of influence and then settle back.
It is enough.
Eileen McDargh, CSP, CPAE authored one of the first
books on work/life balance. Numerous books and articles later,
Eileen serves the meetings industry as a popular international
keynoter and on the Board of Directors of the National Speakers
Association. You can find products and services offered by
Eileen at http://www.EileenMcDargh.com
|
